AVENGE ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I have a Hounds tooth jacket, it’s lined, but it’s like a thousand hungry little hound’s teeth are gnawing at my neck.

While driving today, some lady on the highway was driving behind me in the fast lane making the sign for “phone” and then banging it down like an angry charades player. I glance at her in my review mirror and she keeps repeating the action, her pinky and pointer finger extended at her ear, “The Phone” and then dramatically she would do the air “Hang Up”. By the fourth or fifth time she does this, I notice her van starting to swerve. Yikes, that’s no good. I told my caller that the woman behind me was going to get into an accident if I didn’t hang up. Some people are so dangerous!

My mom and her twin, my Aunt Marg who’s visiting for the week came over to help me out with some housework. While I organized my office, they folded laundry and did dishes.

Here’s and excerpt: “Cracks? YOU WANNA SEE CRACKS!!”

It only got better.

I L – O – V – E , love-love-love my Aunt Marg. The two have been baking and cooking all week and left me quite possibly the best turkey soup on earth. And. As Aunt Marg puts it; the turkey didn’t just fly over the soup, it’s loaded with meat.

:-)

While the three of us worked, I scrounged for details to put my family linage together. I still don’t know my background. I know that I’m French, part Irish and part…. Stray!

GERMAN – Great Grandma (they don’t know for sure, she came over by boat, was an orphan and then she literally disappeared. My Grandma’s sisters were lent out to two wealthy families for home cleaning as young girls and both families paid for the girls education in Toronto. My Grandma worked as a cook for the men up in Bear Island – Lake Temagami, then she met my Grandpa)
ITALIAN – Grandma (dad’s side – Mob relations? She denied that she was Italian or maybe she wasn’t? Who knows?)
AFRICAN AMERICAN – Somewhere on my mother’s side they say.

These are questionable and under investigation, most surprising was that my Great Grandpa was from Holland.

Gotta go. Spiderman is on! Oh that Peter Parker. *sigh*

Sharp As A Marble

Veronica Mars = VERY GOOD. At times I feel like I haven’t found "My Tribe" of not only other fair skinned, slender, blue eyed, Swiss-looking people, magical little elfin looking folk with blond eyelashes and Julianne Moorish tissue paper skin, Heather Locklear-esque…But also cut from the cloth of underdog lover, fighter of justice, willing to put yourself in the line of fire for a greater good, adventurer type spirits, those with spunk, hutzpah, the whole nine yards. The character Veronica Mars enraptures this like a long lost kindred spirit and she has good dressing style – bonus! Thank you Dave – a new show to watch! :-)

Hockey this morning! Kiddies were on the rink 8am sharp. I yakked with another hockey mom who happens to be “from my tribe”. I had been feeling guity about thinking that the Da Vinci Code was *CRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRAP* and was feeling even more abnormal that I wanted to read a book from the series Little House on the Prairie or Anne of Green Gables. Today, said friend happen to be reading about the Ingalls and it felt ok to want a story that didn’t have monsters, killing, stealing, guns, incest, just pure innocent stuff, as wholesome and comforting as a heavy quilted blanket made with love. Maybe behind this stealth SEXY dangerous exterior there is a part of me who just wants to be tucked in at night with a nice safe book.

After hockey it’s a visit to the church. I’m not catholic, French-Irish Protestant (roughly translates into “slut” I think) anyway…Omar will be receiving his first communion and reconciliation, sounds like wireless meets accounting to me but cut me some slack I’m in the learning curve on this stuff. All parents seated, brightly light church, comfy seats, oh! A pull out foot bench – how thoughtful! Nice warm orange coloured wood casts a vibrant hue throughout the place – the church is church-eerie QUIET, but comfortable enough. It must be a family run church, cause someone’s father begins talking, my mind takes that as it’s cue to begin a string of useless thoughts bouncing around like a thousand ping-pong ball released on concrete. This tangent lasts long enough for me to notice and I gently bring my attention back to the speaker. Surely I'm possessed. It’s around this time that my cell phone goes off. After the twelfth ring or so, I have checked every pocket twice, smiling politely with just the right amount of apology thrown in for good measure. Nobody even HAS this number – I think to myself…. Finally the caller gives up and I find the phone not in any of the four pockets in the bomber jacket but the pocket of my fleece that I am wearing UNDER my bomber jacket and precisely where the sound was coming from – in the absense of any stress, this makes perfect sense. I silently ponder whether or not to now make MORE noise by shutting the phone off, but NO, I’m a gambling sorta gal. Lightening won’t strike twice. I compose myself and shake off any guilt about not being the type of person who plans ahead when a speaker takes the stand by pre-empting phone calls and turning their phone off, I’m human, I’m entitled to make mistakes, this cell phone thing is new to me. I am pardoned - spared from The Cross. Now, who’s this speaking, what is she talking about, that must be the mother …reconciliation, yes, yes, I’m “down” with that as I mentally jog to catch up….Then, as if it were God himself calling me, wouldn’tcha know it, the phone begins to ring again. AHA! But now, I’ve got the phone EXACTLY where I want it. That phone's my bitch.

Me: (in whisper laced with irritation) Hello?

The Intruder: Yeah, hi, is Jacques there?

***??!! JACQUES !!?? Who the f*@# is Jacques?!?***

Me: (in the best “Christian” voice I can muster up) You’ve got the wrong number.

The Intruder: (muffled as the phone is now 12” away from my ear) …. Mraw, maw maw-maw…

Me: *Click* (more polite grinning, hang head, shake head, chuckle, shrug shoulders, smile, mentally plot death of Intruder - oh, how Christian of me!!!)



Later, I deducted that while I'm just not “good at" church. Tomorrow I’m gonna try again with my friend, we’re doing breakfast then church together – I’ll be sure to be on my best behaviour. Phone’s off.

See what a quick learn I am?